Last Friday Night
by Jaden Lariya
Summary: "We are so screwed," Yami groans, leaning back and clutching his pounding head.  Bakura gives him an evil smirk.  "Oh well, at least you didn't have hot man-sex with Joey!"  M for references to sex and occasional language.  Beware of falling crack.


_**A/N: Inspired by eclipseoftheheart116's AMV. Enjoy the pure crack.**_

* * *

><p><em>Why is there a Kuriboh on the ceiling? And why is Bakura using me as a pillow? Wait… WHAT!<em>

Yami lets out on indignant screech and rockets out of bed. A snarled curse confirms the Pharaoh's fears and a pair of murderous brown eyes emerge from under the covers.

"What the hell are you screaming about, you wanker," the thief growls, pushing himself up. Slowly, but surely, realization dawns in hazy eyes. "No."

Yami nods, gulping. "I think so."

"No."

"Look around you, Bakura."

The thief reluctantly obeys, scanning the room very slowly. Mai and Tea are sprawled in a tangled heap, covered in glitter and not much else. Duke is leaning against the far wall, a very content Serenity sleeping in his lap, and not even two feet away, Joey, Tristan, and… Kaiba. They are all kind of strung around each other, and looking very pleased.

"I cannot deal with this right now," grumbles Bakura, curling up again under the blankets. "My head is killing me, and you reek like several kinds of alcohol."

A quick breath-check by Yami, and he has to agree. "Fine, we'll figure this out later," he murmurs, slipping back into the bed with Bakura. Surprisingly, the thief says nothing, and just clutches his pounding head.

* * *

><p>"Oh, Yaaaaaamiiiiii!"<p>

_Now what…._

"Spiiiiiiriiiiiit!"

"Get out of here, landlord! I don't want to know what unspeakable things I did with the Ra-damned Pharaoh last night!"

_Ah, that's what…._

Yami heaves himself upright and squints blearily at his _hikari_.

"Partner, why is the chandelier on the floor?"

Yugi snickers quietly, but soon is unable to hold his mirth in, falling onto the bed and giggling insanely. Yami simply raises an eyebrow, and glances at Bakura. The other spirit is looking at a spot on the Pharaoh's neck, eyes wide. At the question in his eyes, Ryou hands Yami a small mirror and points to his neck. The Spirit of the Puzzle makes a strangled sound and fingers the bruises on his neck… Or are they hickies? Yami's stunned eyes make their slow way to his partner's face.

"I-I'm so sorry, Yami! But this is the best thing to happen since… Oh, I don't even know!" Yugi squeals, clutching his aching stomach. Yami pinches the bridge of his nose with a groan as Ryou, too, falls into giggles.

"I think I need a ginger ale…" he mutters, climbing carefully out of bed. He has to pause as the room spins around him, but manages to take a trembling step forward. Suddenly, Joey flips over, his arm flying out and catching the Pharaoh by the foot. The hung-over spirit loses his balance and falls flat on his face with a groaning curse.

"Nice epic fail, your majesty." Another angry curse referencing the size of Bakura's you-know-what follows the thief's snide comment.

"Oh my God, Yugi. Please tell me you didn't!"

The young man has the dignity to look sheepish at his _yami's _plea. He shakes his head.

"Don't worry, I didn't… yet…."

"What the fuck is that supposed to mean!" Yugi winces at the thief's harsh language.

"Ugh… Why is it so bright in here? Yuge! You around here somewhere?"

Yugi jumps up, taking the excuse to escape the two enraged spirits. He pads carefully around the still-sleeping forms of Tristan and Kaiba to plop into a sitting position next to his friend. He waves a hand in front of Joey's glazed-over eyes. The blond blinks and looks back at Yugi.

"Yuge, are those flamingos in the pool?"

* * *

><p>Yugi stands next to Ryou in front of the couches with a pleased expression.<p>

"Took nearly all morning, but we finally got everyone semi-conscious and in one place," Ryou murmurs happily. Yugi nods and looks around his gathered friends. If he is going to be completely honest, they all look absolutely terrible. Tea and Mai seem to be in a state of shock, Tristan and Joey keep giving each other awkward glances, and Kaiba simply refuses to look at any of them. The only ones who look slightly happy are Duke and Serenity, curled up on one end of the sofa farthest away from Joey, who keeps sending Duke nasty looks. Yugi sighs and claps his hands. Several of those in front of him wince and press a finger to their temples.

"Oop, sorry," he murmurs, doing a last glance-over of his friends. His brows furrow in confusion. "Wait, has anyone seen Marik?"

"I'm here… kinda…" All heads turn to see a very disheveled Marik stumbles in and flops down next to an outraged Bakura. "Remind me not to fall asleep outside… I think the neighbors think we're a bunch of hooligans…"

"Well, you guys were kinda crazy last night," Ryou interjects. Yugi nods in agreement, pulling a camera out of his back pocket. Flipping to "photo view mode", he turns the camera around for his friends to see. They all crowd around as Yugi goes through the photos.

"See, Joey and Mai danced on the table, Bakura and Yami got into a drinking contest… I'm still not sure who won that…" Yugi says, skipping over a few of his and Ryou, toasting. Then, a picture of Kaiba and Joey came up. Both made undignified sounds at the photo of them… kissing.

"There is no way."

"I don't remember that! Yuge, I couldn't of kissed- KAIBA!"

Yugi shrugs, moving on. A picture of Tea and Mai dancing down the street, followed by a very tipsy Duke. At Yami's questioning look, Yugi says: "You got kicked out for trying to drink everything in the club…"

The next confuses everyone except for Ryou and Yugi. All that can be seen is the orange-yellow glow of a sodium vapor lamp and the silhouette of Bakura and… Yami's leather shirt being flung behind him.

"Why do I feel like I am never going to see that shirt ever again, partner?"

"Well, you guys did go streaking in the park… Oh! And Joey and Tristan went skinny-dipping in the pond there!" he exclaims at the next picture, running off into an adjacent room, Ryou hot on his heels. "These are going on Facebook!"

Yami and Bakura share a long-suffering look as everyone tries to dash after the two devious _hikaris_.

"We are so screwed," Yami groans, leaning back and clutching his pounding head. Bakura gives him an evil smirk.

"Oh well, at least you didn't have hot man-sex with Joey!"


End file.
